Lately I'm seeing a trend in self-help books and internet sites that promote the idea that one should alleviate one's own "suffering" in order to be one's best self. Surely that concept itself is not revolutionary, and I fully support the idea that one must take care of one's self before one can take care of others or be a force for good in the world.
However....
I am seeing this trend more and more as an excuse to divorce one's self from the ills of the world. I recently read an article that basically suggested that shit happens, it's supposed to happen, and it's not one's job to worry about it. Apparently, under this theory, one's only responsibility is to one's self-protection. I find this absolutely appalling. Worse, I often find it stated in the context of self-centered, self-help-minded pseudo-religion.
I was raised on the heels of the civil rights movement, from a place where people of all and no faiths came together to insist that Americans of color be treated equally and have the same rights as white Americans. Civil rights leaders and their followers risked their lives (and their lives were sometimes taken) in order for this equality of opportunity be afforded. Yes, this did cause them pain. Change sometimes requires suffering. I don't believe it needs to require the same level of suffering for everyone or for every injustice, but I do believe in upholding the ideal that sometimes one must sacrifice a little of one's own happiness, comfort, and security to achieve justice for all.
Anyone who knows the stories of Buddha, or Jesus, or the Hebrew Exodus is aware that self-actualization or group change that has any meaning is preceded by a period of suffering. Suffering is part of the process of being a better person and of creating a better world. That doesn't mean accepting someone else's suffering, or even accepting one's own suffering permanently - but it does mean that conflict and pain often precedes meaningful change.
There is a time for letting go. Of this I have no doubt. There is a time when one must recognize that one is suffering for no good reason, and when one must cease that suffering in order to move on. But I also have no doubt that there is a time for struggle. I worry about a culture where we seriously seem to want to tell people that alleviating our own personal suffering - at the possible expense of helping others alleviate theirs - is a legitimate path to personal salvation. I don't want to live in a world where people are so selfish and isolated, and I certainly don't want to be that kind of person.
